sex surrogate


Talk about sex is not going to end. Each topic must be present that can be discussed or explore to be discussed. For me personally, seeking to discuss sex is fun. Not boring because the science of sex will continue to be new and sustainable.

Talking about sex, there are interesting topics that I want to share in this post. In accordance with the title above that I want to chat casually about what is sex surrogate and all the debate. One topic that is still often a debate is sex surrogate is still equated with prostitution. Is that true? Let’s talk about it.

Sex surrogate itself is actually like a replacement sex. How about surrogate mother? Who lends her womb to be filled with sprema cells from other people (which  is not have special relation) and during childbirth, then the child owned by others? Well … actually the principle is almost the same as sex surrogate, but the difference is that is given is not a womb but a form of sexual activity.

The first appearance of sex surrogates was introduced by Masters and Johnson in their book “Human Sexual Inadequacy” published in the 1970s. They believe that to have a quality sex life, must learn by doing so could instantly feeling it. The statement is not only as a mere assumption, because it is the result of research they have done on some people who had sexual disorders. The subjects will perform a series of treatments that have been designed in such a way as to overcome sexual dysfunction. For subjects who do not have a partner then paired with a surrogate or surrogate.Each surrogate will follow the direction of the trained therapist and also act as a mentor for the subject.

And the peak in the 1980s know the practice of sex surrogate is getting a lot of interest in the United States. However, a few years later sex surrogate practice became controversial, so its popularity gradually decreased.

Sex Surrogate Different With Prostitution

One controversy that is still debated today is that in some places sex surrogate  equated with the practice of prostitution. Yes, many who think like that because sex surrogate such as providing sex to foreigners who are hungry for sex and get paid like in prostitution. Especially the opinion is very widely occurred in countries that still think sex is a very very taboo.

However, there is a forgotten part that the background and the purpose of sex surrogate and prostitute is very different. Sex surrogate works professionally as a mentor to clients and is one part of sex therapy treatments. While the prostitute is only buying and selling sex just to meet the fulfillment of sexual desire.

And this point is the basis that actually sex surrogate and prostitute is very very different. Probably out there are many professional prostitutes who have various techniques to be able to satisfy customers, but prostitutes have no goal for therapy or healing, but on the basis of sheer pleasure and of course at the request of the buyer.

On the other hand the sex surrogate, must meet certain training so that have skill to educate client in handling sexual problem. And to have the skill as a sex surrogates is not easy and cheap.

His clients are also not arbitrary. Clients who use sex surrogate services must go through the assestement step by the therapist. Usually a lot of couples who have poor bed quality that use sex surrogate services. Like Sexless Marriage, anxiety, depression, sexual trauma, etc. In addition to the couples, therapy involving sex surrogate is also mostly done in the case of people who have physical dissabilities.

Like us,  sex is a living instinct in us, as well as people who have physical limitations also have passion and sex instinct. As in the case of people who have spinal muscular atropy that loses almost all of its body functions except the thumb and the muscles on the face. Sex surrogate helps disability to improve the quality of life through improving the quality of sex life. And it has been proven in many cases, one of which is quite famous is experience with sex surrogate written by Mark O’Brien a special needs in 1990. And Mark’s experience is then filed under the title “The Session”.

Until now so many people used sex services surrogate all over the world. Even the International Professional Surrogate Association, revealed data that not only men but now began women no longer hesitate to go to the therapy clinic that provides sex surrogate services.

In Indonesia maybe this profession is not too popular, because of the controversy in it. But I think this profession exists and many people are already using this service.

Anyone interested to wear sex surrogate service?


Handjob For Homeless (18+)

Tepatnya setahun yang lalu, seorang kerabat yang sedang bekerja di Amerika mengirimkan  sebuah link video tentang teaser social pilot project yang bernama Handjob for Homeles (silahkan cari sendiri kalo error 😛 ). Awalnya kaget dan jijik setelah melihat video tersebut. Kaget, karena kok bisa ada social pilot project yang menggunakan cara yang tidak lazim tersebut, setelah kaget respon berikutnya adalah jijik karena sebelumnya aku baru saja mengalami kejadian dipamerin titit yang masih terbayang-bayang dibenakku. Sebenarnya, ada maksud dan tujuannya mengapa kerabat jauhku itu mengirimkan link tersebut, yaitu agar aku mengkritisi kegiatan tersebut.

Pertama-tama jelas pendapatku tidak setuju dengan kegiatan tersebut. Selain tidak lazim, kegiatan tersebut useless karena tidak memberikan sebuah manfaat untuk membantu kehidupan si homeless selanjutnya. Kerabatku dengan santainya membalas argumenku dengan sederhana, “coba dipikir lagi”.

Setelah, berpikir ulang ternyata pendapatku itu menggunakan sudut pandang orang Indonesia, dimana kegiatan tersebut memang tidak lazim dan penuh dengan ketabuan hehehe. Setelah aku mencoba mengubah sudut pandang, ternyata ada kemungkinan kegiatan tersebut lazim diberlakukan di negara lain, seperti Amerika misalnya. Memberikan bantuan secara materi pada homeless di Amerika mungkin sudah menjadi hal yang mainstream, sedangkan memberikan bantuan handjob pada homeless merupakan suatu bantuan yang out of the box, pikirku. Selain memberikan kenyamanan secara  psikologis, ternyata handjob disinyalir bisa membantu menurunkan tingkat pelecehan seksual yang dilakukan homeless pada warga sekitar. Memang belum ada angka pasti apakah kegiatan tersebut benar-benar efektif menurunkan tingkat pelecehan, namanya juga pilot project pastinya masih dalam penelitian lebih lanjut.

Aku juga tak lupa riset melalui googling terkait pilot project tersebut, dan hasilnya aku belum menemukan ada yang membahasnya lebih lanjut. Bisa jadi project tersebut dilakukan hanya dalam lingkungan tertentu dan hasil risetnyapun untuk kalangan tertentu atau memang project tersebut menuai banyak kontroversi sehingga diberhentikan.

Terlepas jadi atau tidaknya project tersebut dilaksanakan, aku pribadi sebenarnya setuju dengan project tersebut jika tujuannya sebagai upaya penurunan pelecehan seksual. Tak lupa aku juga mencari beberapa jurnal yang mendukung argumenku, yaitu terdapat riset yang mengatakan bahwa handjob / masturbasi dapat menurunkan tingkat kecemasan serta meningkatkan self-esteem (Dodson, 1987). Selain itu, dalam penelitian yang dilakukan LoPiccolo & Lobitz, (1972) juga mengungkapkan bahwa masturbasi merupakan langkah awal dalam tahap terapi disfungsi seksual. Sehingga, dapat dikatan bahwa dalam situasi tertentu, masturbasi memang dapat memberikan efek dalam peningkatan kesehatan seksual  serta psikis. Selain dalam situasi dan kondisi tertentu,  menurutku si subyek penerima treatmen pun juga harus diseleksi dengan teliti, jangan sampe salah sasaran misalnya orang yang ngaku-ngaku homeless agar bisa mendapatkan treatmen handjob dari volunteer, haha. Tapi, kalo ini di lakuka di Indonesia, aku pastinya nggak setuju. Sebab aku yakin kegiatan ini sangat amat menuai kontroversi dan penolakan besar-besaran 😀

Kalo kamu gimana? Setuju nggak dengan Handjob for Homeless social project??